Wednesday, April 29, 2009

500th Post, Believe it or Not


Here are a couple of the things that have sprung from my son's imagination in the last few days. In no particular order...


A. He told our neighbor friend, Carl, "I wish Mary Magdalene had put spices on Jesus' body the first day instead of the third, because if anyone smelled him that first day, they would wish she had been there."

Which is probably sacrilegious, but he's five, so I just had to laugh and hope that God would factor that in to His reaction too.

B. He also invented his own galaxy (called Ellipse) which has a star (called Alexandra) around which orbit ten planets. He made all of this up on the fly after we read a book about astronomy. Before each planet he would say, in a Bob Barker kind of voice, "And here's planet number 1 (or 2 or whatever)" The planets are: (in his own words...not all of his own words, there isn't room. Just some of his words, but none of mine, which is what I meant)

1. Rubber - It's made of rubber
2. Markable - Made of stuff that is washable for markers
3. Pigs' Meat - People only can eat pigs' meat
4. Burn - Closer to Alexandra than Mercury is to our sun
5. Soundwaves - Really, really tiny; tinier than Pluto, I call it a Double-Dwarf planet. It also is very, very loud.
6. Flammable - It has blamming (sic) fires around it surface. The burning flams (sic) are hotter than the sun. It is the closest to Alexandra.
7. Giant - The biggest planet that is orbiting Alexandra. No people live on it.
8. Clip - But anyway, it has one big, BIG, BIG storm.
9. Rip - Has stuff that is very, very soft. Like leather and a big soft rock. It's small.
10. Snake - Lots and lots of snakes live on snake.

Then he proceeded to be one of his characters (invented previously) called Strong Skunk. ("He's very strong. He can rip metal and steel!") and decided he lived on Soundwaves, previously known as Zaya's bedroom.

C. Today also brought us a new character; Frostie, the Siberian Tiger. He likes to wipe deer brains on his white stripes and then his black stripes soak up the brain juices. (And no, we've never taken him hunting. I have no idea how my children became so cynical when it comes to death and gore. I don't even watch that kind of thing on TV, let alone allow my children to watch it.)

D. While I was cooking supper, he came up to me and told me that Spikit (another imaginary friend who has been with us lo, these many years) does not poop and pee like a normal person. This is roughly how the conversation went.

Mom - Well, then what happens to all his food.

Zaya - It just hits these spiky things in his intestines and poof, it turns into a gas.

Mom - Ummm, so he just toots?

Zaya - No, Mom. It just turns into gas, the way dry ice does.

Mom - Oh, it sublimates.

Zaya - Yeah, it sublimates. And then it's just gone.

Mom - That's not the way it works, though, because the gas would build up in his intestines and then he would just explode.

Zaya - Well, anyway, Mom, it just goes up his esophagus.

Mom - So he burps it out.

Zaya - No, he just blows it out, like this. (Blows air out)

Mom - Then it couldn't have come from his esophagus, it has to have traveled through his blood stream to his lungs, then he could blow it out as air.

Zaya - Yeah, you're right. It goes to his lungs, and then he just blows it out.

If anyone had told me five years ago that I would be having these kind of strange conversations with my screaming infant before he left Pre-K, I'm not sure whether I would have laughed or cried.

Monday, April 27, 2009

Family Outing

We took a spontaneous family trip to the Science Museum this Saturday. It was great! The kids loved the museum and we had to drag them away from it finally so we could all go eat.

When I was little it was called the Omniplex, and was loads of fun, but nowhere near as kid friendly as it is now. They've got all sorts of areas now especially for young children. I have to admit, I was disappointed to see the big molecule jungle gym and the moon swing were gone, but they've added so much I could hardly complain. Hardly. Just a little.

After we toured the whole museum several times and Isaiah stared enthralled at a 40 minute planetarium show (I got tired before he did, really) we all drove to Tokyo. No, not the capital of Japan, a Sushi restaurant in OKC. Art had heard good things about it from co-workers, and he likes odd food, so why not?

I have to say that I wasn't quite as thrilled with it as he was, but then I'm just not real interested in the idea of eating raw fish, no matter how beautifully it's displayed.

We rounded out our trip with a visit to Super Cao Nguyen. A great Asian market with everything you could possibly imagine from the countries of the far east. I'm sure it seems Americanized to them, but it seems very foreign to us. The smell is even different. I think it might be my new favorite store, just because there is so much that is so new and interesting to us. I had to sort and reorganize my pantry today just to fit everything we bought in there.

The only thing bad about our little excursion, was that I forgot my camera! Art didn't understand what the big deal was. I will definitely have to take them back soon, just so I can get pictures. Pathetic and womanly of me, I realize, but reality nonetheless.

Thursday, April 23, 2009

Our Own Slice of the American Dream


Guess who now owns their home?

That's right, we paid it off yesterday, and you can consider this my online mortgage burning party!

Crackle!
Fizzle!
Crackle!
Zing!

Now we start saving up for the garage...and a new (used) mini van...and the kids' school tuition...and maybe a vacation someday...and...

so it's not like life will actually change, but it does feel great to owe no man (or woman.)

We've been loosely following Dave Ramsey's Financial Peace plan since we got married and a kind wedding guest bought us his first book. I highly recommend you find a copy (we have both editions and would be happy to loan them out.) and try it.

In celebration, and this is the exact opposite of what my husband would do, I went out and bought a new pair of shoes. (ok, and a few shirts, but we don't need to talk about that.) These are definitely the coolest shoes I've ever had, and I'm looking forward to finding out if they live up to all the hype. As I bought them I could just see my mother rolling her eyes, but here's the great part about being an adult...I bought them anyway. The Freedom!



Art would like a pair of these too, but they don't work if your second toes is more than 1/6 in. longer than your big toe, and his is more like 1/4 inch. Your feet also have to be the same size, and Art's are significantly different. It's all very sad for the poor crooked-footed fellow.

Thursday, April 16, 2009

Drum Roll Please



Oh, what a sweet little girl all dressed up in purple.






Oh wait...that's my son.



Here's the girl.


Introducing....




Power Purple and Pink Power! These are the two new superheroes that appeared at my house this afternoon. (Wardrobe assistance and design provided by neighbor Carl)

Saturday, April 11, 2009

Conquering the Wichitas



Today we started what I hope will be a family tradition, except that we might have to have it the week before or after Easter rather than the week of for reasons which I will explain later.

We went to the Wichita Mountains Wildlife Refuge. A place out here in Western Oklahoma where I remember visiting as a child, but where I've never taken my own children. We climbed up Elk Mountain, and the kids did very well. We called them Edmund and Tenzing, but Mim didn't like it and told us we had to call her by her last name. There were no major ouchies, which was a miracle in itself. Here are Mim and Zay resting along the way.







Here we are at the summit. I told Zaya that he can call himself a mountaineer now. He thought maybe he was the first 5-year-old to climb a mountain. We had to disillusion the little climber.







After the hike, we went to the visitor center, which has a ton of information about the animals and plants in the refuge in a very kid-friendly set up with lots of activities and interesting taxidermy. We also stopped at the prairie dog village, which is so much fun to watch. There are literally hundreds of prairie dog holes, and the little guys are so used to visitors that they'll walk right up to the fence or just stand outside their burrows and squeak at you. Here are the kids getting up close and personal with one particular member of the prairie dog community.



Spikit, Zaya's imaginary friend, now has a pet Prairie Dog named Smashville, a Collie named Swift, and a cat named Bobwhite. That all developed on the car-ride home. By the by.

We really wanted to see the Holy City, and yes, I realize that one can't drive to Jerusalem. The Holy City is a small group of stone building created to resemble the real buildings from the life of Christ, from the stable and manger to the cross and the tomb. They're life-size-ish and made of the red rock of the area. Very impressive. Unfortunately, they were setting up for the Passion Play that they have every year, so we weren't able to walk around. We were all disappointed, but too tired to expend much energy mourning. The kids were asleep before the we left the Refuge, and slept most of the way home. (Which means they will not want to go to sleep tonight, but we'll cross that bridge later.)

Here they are relaxing with Daddy in the chair.



All in all, that beat watching a bunch of spoiled children run around a playground looking for eggs filled with candy and toys. I think I'm going to like making our own traditions.

Friday, April 03, 2009

Aaarrgghhh!

This morning I made an unexpected and sudden stop at Walgreens to buy the following: 409 spray cleaner, Lysol spray, Arm and Hammer Pet Fresh Odor Eliminator, disposable gloves, cheap rags and towels, and trash bags. If they offered cars, I might would've traded right then and there.

Can anyone out there guess what happened in my car this morning while I was on the interstate overpass? Let me give you a hint. Zaya didn't go to school today after all.

Oh, and then I dropped my cell phone in the bathtub while helping a certain son of mine wash himself. It is in pieces on the bookshelf. It may or may not work in the future. Only time will tell. Many things, actually.

If any of you want to contact me for any reason, it'll have to be by e-mail.

Update: My phone appears to work. I haven't received any calls on it yet, but I have been able to call out. Also, Zaya has been perfectly fine. He hasn't felt badly at all since the incident this morning. He's hungry and thirsty and running around like a crazed weasel. Things are completely normal. Odd, but welcome.